What if you had 3 guaranteed questions to head off competition in dialogue and avoid unnecessary conflict; how much more successful would your conversations be?
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How many times have you been in “conversation” with someone and realized they were busy compiling competitive talking points? Or, maybe what began as a civil discourse erupted into an argument. Facilitating pre-trial focus groups as a litigation consultant taught me that most everybody wants to say something against you, your client, your case, and justice in general.
Practical Tip: I learned the hard way; but I learned. To head off competition in dialogue use thoughtful questions and intentional listening. Here are my 3 tried and true tips for any conversation:
1. Would you tell me more about that?
2. How did you arrive at that position?
3. Could you make room for this idea as well as the one you already hold?
Bonus Tip: Abandon the word “Why?” It sets up a defensive posture and serves no one.
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Production Team: Quarter Moon Story Arts
Music: Mer’s Waltz from Crossing the Waters by Steve Schuch & Night Heron Music
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